What is a frog?  Is it a man?  It has legs and tiny hands like a man yet it is not.  If a man could jump as high as a frog you know how fucking high he would be?  Extremely high I imagine.

But back to the topic at hand, what is a frog?  I'm looking at it sitting blissfully upon its leaf... Do you think its looking back at me contemplating what a man is?  Do you think it can understand and compute the complexities of day to day life as a human?  Could it work out the combination lock my wife has put on the fridge to stop me eating raw mince meat when I'm sleep walking? 

All these things I ponder, staring at the frog on its little leaf.  I lost my phone and keys hours ago and I'm lost in the woods please if you're reading this send help I'm confused and I think I licked it too hard.