• jazz for my soul
  • jazz for my soul
  • jazz for my soul
  • jazz for my soul

jazz for my soul

Regular price

As a highly adaptable bug, I was able to learn the saxophone to a master level in only 6 hours. Albeit my mind was totally jacked up on modafinil and alpha power supplements I had illegally imported weeks prior but what's important here is the sweet music I was now able to make, down at the beach to anyone who would listen.

My soul was fine tuned to the invisible jazz resonance of the world and I let it flow through my every movement, all of my limbs licking the buttons of the saxophone like I was making love to it as my mandibles kissed the reed and I blew into it, as if I was reinflating a caprisun or if I was spitting bobba tea balls at my grandma.

The dolphins crawled out of the ocean on their bellies to watch me play and they died there, on the sand, as I played my sad ocean jazz.


• Plays unintelligible jazz music when wet
• allows you to play 'careless whisper' with zero training

• 100% cotton
• Fabric weight: 6.0 oz/y² (203.4 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk
• Boxy fit
• has 2 dolphins on it who do not do drugs
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Seamless double-needle 7⁄8″ (2.2 cm) collar
• Double-needle stitched sleeves and bottom hem
• Quarter-turned to avoid crease down the middle


Size guide